Until last week I really had no desire to be here. Even on the plane, I had that excited 'I'm going somewhere feeling' but I still wasn't 100% in the game. Oooo, fascinating insights already. I suppose that at some point I felt like I had this whole 'travel' business down and in comparison
to many I do. What I am finding is that my sense of security isn't quite as secure as I would like it to be (beer helps) and at the same time I feel completely at home...in most areas. I think a part of that is because I am here with my Dad.
Someone I look to for security and when he damn well knows I can do things on my own it pushes me a bit outside the comfort zone. Thankfully I'm used to that because he's been doing it my entire life!
Going back to October when I took Sacred Gifts, the gift of cultural integration is a gift I thought I wanted to have. Actually I wanted to think I had it really badly and this trip is revealing to me that I most certainly do not. I am able to integrate easily with people and I have no problems socializing and learning new things, yet that whole integrating into a culture...I'm really not sure that is something I need to have anymore. I'm happy to be who I am and I'm happy to fit in our out wherever I am. I'm glad I have some more clarity around that little gift. I also realized this gift might not be within me when I started watching one of the guys we're here with just totally meld into a group of Biminites playing pool. I smiled because I knew why it was so easy for him to just do it.
I'm the opposite. I'm the encourager so whe
n I'm in new places I wait for people to come to me, or talk to me and that seems to be pretty easy in this area.
In the process of three paragraphs I've understood that I have a commitment issue with Bimini AND that I am indeed a little apprehensive about being in new places with people I don't know. Although, that really only lasted one day because by the end of the first night at the Thirsty Turtle we now knew most of the people on the north end of the south island. Dimaggio, my new Bimini BFF has got my back and THAT makes me feel good. To be honest, I'm sure most of them would have my back so long as I wasn't the one instigating the trouble....I encourage...never instigate. lol
Another thing I have learned in the last two days being down here is silence is golden, especially when there is little of it being in a condo with three 24yr old guys. I can't blame them though, I was exactly the same way! Being in the moment, listening and having fun above all, letting the guards down...it's a good thing.
As we've finally settled in we're looking forward to getting out on the water. I still have two full weeks here. It may or may not fly by, but if the last two days are any indication it will flow absolutely at the right pace and bring all sorts of treasures real and imagined.
Have an amazing holiday! Merry Christmas from Bimini! xoxoxo